The Chronicles of G

The Aftermath. This one will be much harder to write than the last post. I can speak about my father's death in a very matter of fact way, but when I talk about the emotions/effects it had on my life...well that is much harder. This will likely be all over the place but writing these feelings out for the first time all in one place is needed I suppose. I feel like I should start by discussing the fucked up issues I have from my father's existence.  Although I have few memories of my father living, I can remember the anger. The constant shouting. The fear I felt by his presence. I remember him being so upset by my crying one time that he pulled over and made us walk home. He was never one to shy away from a fight and once when a guy cut him off while driving, he got out and beat the shit out of the guy and got back in our car so calm like nothing had happened. For my whole life I have been afraid of men. Any man that gets too loud makes me shake. My stomach drops and I feel like